If your ex broke up with you, chances are he or she didn’t find what they were looking for in the relationship. To get them back, you’ll need to show them that they’re wrong. How you go about doing this is important, but just as equally important is the timing. When trying to win back a boyfriend or girlfriend, it’s critical that you do things in the proper order, at the right times. Because if not, an ex tends to take your moves as direct confrontation – and soon they will be running in the opposite direction.
The following steps should be taken when trying to get your ex back:
Accept Things – Don’t fight your break up when it initially happens. Your ex has made up his or her mind, so trying to convince them otherwise is pretty hopeless. By accepting your ex’s decision, you’re actually aligning yourself on the same side as your ex boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s not what they expect, and they’ll respect you for not fighting them on it.
Give Your Ex Time and Space – Most people fail at this point in the reconciliation process. Your ex wants to be left alone right now, and you should leave them to their thoughts. Being by themselves will make your ex think about the decision to break up, and actually begin to miss you. Constantly hounding your ex by sending them emails, text-messages, or calling them on the phone is only going to make them angry and annoyed.
Concentrate On Yourself – At this point, you’ve got some time to yourself. Toss your phone over your shoulder and unplug your computer. Hit the gym, take up running, get some new outfits, work on your tan. The next time you ex sees you, his or her jaw should hit the floor. Feeling good and looking good are always the best revenge when it comes to being dumped. Eventually you’ll reestablish contact with your ex and work on making them want you back on emotional levels. But for now? Work on the physical.
Work on Thinking Positive – As you’re making yourself physically look better, you should also work on your inner self. Let go of the past relationship. Exercising will release endorphins and cause the stress of the break up to melt away, replacing it with unlimited energy. Channel this energy into positive thoughts, and visualize getting back together with your ex. See it in your mind, but also believe it. Know that one day you’ll be together again, and your reconciliation will happen. Give off nothing but good vibes, which will attract people to you – friends, family, and everyone else. The confidence and drive you’ll obtain from positive thinking will radiate from you when you finally run into your ex again, and he or she will see a whole new you.
Withdraw The Safety Net – After you’ve left your ex alone for a while and worked on improving yourself, take away your ex’s safety net. He or she will probably have contacted you by now, just to say hi or see how you’re doing. They may want to even remain friends. You need to refuse such offers. Don’t let your ex feel comfortable in the break up by giving them the companionship and security that comes with knowing where you are and what you’re doing. Steer clear of them, do your own thing, and if they ask to be friends? Tell them you don’t think it’s such a good idea. They wanted to be alone? Give them solitude. Let your ex be more alone than he or she really cares to be… making them marvel at how quickly you’ve moved on. This also lets your ex know you’re not sitting around waiting to come back at the snap of their fingers. It forces them to face losing you for good – which makes them question the break up.
Reconnect In Person – After enough time has passed, it’s a good idea to meet your ex face to face. Accept their next contact, or find a reason to contact them (there are several good ideas for this). Instead of a lengthy phone call, tell them you have to run out… but you’d like to meet for lunch or coffee. Pick somewhere neutral and casual, a place where you’ve never gone before that has no meaning for either of you. Your ex will accept, mainly because he or she will be curious to know what you’ve been up to. And since you’ve let enough time pass doing your own thing, your ex doesn’t see this move as desperate or contrived. Setting up a reunion date is a crucial step toward getting your ex back.
Rather than ask how do you get your ex back, you should be asking how they can get youback instead! Making yourself desirable in all ways is one of the key moves to fixing a break up. When you can accomplish this, the task of getting together again is made much simpler.
If you’ve broken up and want to date your ex again, you must be proactive. Start on the road to Getting Back Your Ex Girlfriend … or in the case of an ex boyfriend, be sure to check out the 8-step process to reconciliation at How To Win Him Back.